Introducing the Choother

I like kids, honestly I do.  But, after listening to my neighbour’s children howl, cry, and whine through their open windows while I was working in my backyard, I’ve had enough and need to take action.  I figure one of two things is going to happen: either I’m going to knock on my neighbour’s door and dole out a lesson on good parenting with my Two-by-Four of Learning, or I’ll focus my energy into coming up with a creative solution to an age-old problem.  And so, after consulting the Criminal Code of Canada, I am pleased to introduce the child soother or “Choother.”